Top 10 big dick problems: you know you have a large penis when…

  • 10.  Toothy blowjobs are the norm.

teeth

Let’s face it.  Guys with large members (especially girthy ones) are gonna have a hard time receiving oral sex.  Unless your girl (or guy) has an exceptionally large mouth, this is something you’ll need to get used to.

Solutions?  None to speak of, other than looking for a partner with a really big mouth. Better yet, find a head-giving fanatic with dentures!

 

9.  Your dong hangs down into the toilet water

This one is truly a pain in the ass.  Some toilets have really short bowls or high water levels.  This is a recipe for disaster.  There’s nothing more disgusting than your unit dipping into the water after taking a huge shit.

Solutions?  None, really.  At home you could purchase a toilet with a tall bowl or lower the water level.  In public, the only thing you can do is just be careful.

 

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8.  Some sexual positions are out of the question

As a fellow big dick guy, this is one of the most frustrating for me.  Very few women can handle the big D without some complications.  Therefore, it’s up to the guy to be extra gentle, or let the lady set the pace.

Solutions?  Learn to BE GENTLE.  Don’t just stick it in and pound away.  It takes a little patience and finesse.  Listen to your partner; they will guide you.

 

 

7.  Masturbation requires TWO hands

two hands

wikiart.org

Sure, the job can be done easily with one hand.  But it feels SOOOOO much better with two.  The downside?  This method requires significantly more effort.

Solutions?  Invest in a penis pump (a big one), or lift some weights and build those arm muscles up!

 

 

6.  Hitting the back wall when you’re only part way in

This one is real frustrating for guys and gals.  For a woman, there’s almost nothing more painful than a well hung guy banging up against her cervix.  It’s painful for her, and she’ll likely end the sexy time if it hurts too much.  For him, without full insertion, his pleasure is significantly diminished.

Solutions?  None, really.  You can always look for a girl that has a little more room down there to accommodate your big penis.

 


 

Make sure to read my latest erotic story: Two Hot Chics, One GREAT BIG DICK

 


 

5.  Buying jeans is a challenge

Unless you don’t mind putting your “unit” on display for the world, buying jeans is tricky business.  If skinny or tight fitting jeans are your thing, you have no choice but to let the bulge show.  You could always switch to baggy or loose fitting jeans.  However, for me, I don’t like loose fitting clothing.  So…bulging it is.

Solutions?  Wear baggy pants, or put your unit on display for the world.  Those are your only options.

 

4.  Finding condoms is a real headache

condoms

condomfacts.blogspot.com

Most condoms in the US are relatively the same size.  There are larger sizes available, such as magnums, but these don’t always accommodate the larger gentlemen.  The ring at the bottom often chokes your chicken, and leaves a red ring for a while.

Solutions?  A couple of brands I recommend are the Durex Maximum Love and the Lifestyles SKYN Large. These are wider condoms (56mm) and should accommodate your needs.

 

3.  Bathing suits

This is one of the trickiest problems to date.  There’s really not much you can do here.  A tight Speedo certainly won’t conceal anything.  A baggy swimsuit will still show your member to the entire public pool when you get it wet.

Solutions?  Don’t go swimming in a public pool.  Get used to people staring at your battleship.

 

 

big dick problems

 

2.  Being refused sex

There’s nothing worse than being turned down by a lady friend after she sees what kind of heat you’re packing.  Who doesn’t like the thrill of meeting that hot drunk girl at the bar?  She flirts with you, and you with her.  Some small talk and dancing.  She invites you back to her place for some more drinks and music.  Things get heated and then she reaches down your pants.  Everything stops.  She gets that scared look on her face and outright refuses to have sex with you.

Solutions?  Nothing you can do here.  If she’s too small, or just downright afraid of it, you’re out of luck.  Maybe she can give you a hand job.

 

 

 

 

1.  Accidentally sit on your big dong

This is the absolute worst in my opinion.  You’re having a good night on the town with your friends, having just met some really cute ladies.  You go to have a seat on the bar stool, and CRUNCH…you just sat on your own dick and balls.  Painful and humiliating.  Of course the discomfort goes away, but it takes a bit.  Maybe even a trip to the restroom.  Hopefully your admirers don’t leave while you’re tending to your penis.

Solutions?  Actually there is an easy fix for this.  Proper fitting underwear can basically eliminate this problem.  Compression shorts, or just tight fitting briefs can do the trick.

 


 

Make sure to read my latest erotic story: Two Hot Chics, One GREAT BIG DICK

 


 

The biggest cock on the planet?

He’s 5 feet 9 inches tall, with a flaccid dick length of 9.5 inches! His girth is about the size of the average man’s forearm. And then there’s his balls: the size of grade A large eggs. Yikes!

Women (and men) stare in awe at the bulge in front of his pants. Airport security screeners have accused him of carrying a “concealed weapon.”

A weapon: that’s the understatement of the year!

Meet Jonah Falcon and his massive member.  He quite possibly holds the world record for the largest penis on earth! In this Rolling Stone magazine exclusive, Mr. Falcon talks about the highs and lows of having a truly massive, almost alien sized member.

I’m not sure whether to envy the guy or feel sorry for him.

 

 

Recommended reading @ MrRacy.com

 

Just for laughs

One day, a bartender put up a sign on his door that read “If you can make my horse laugh, I’ll give you a free beer.”

A guy walked in and said, “I’d like to try,” so the bartender showed him to the horse’s stall out back and let him in. The bartender went back to the bar and waited until the man came back and said “He’s laughing. Where’s my beer?”

The bartender was surprised and went back to check. Sure enough the horse was laughing, so he gave the man a free beer. The bartender asked, “How did you do that?”

The man said, “It’s my secret,” then left to drink his beer.

The next day, the bartender saw that his horse was laughing non-stop and was beginning to irritate him. Frustrated, he put up a sign saying, “If you can make the horse cry, I’ll give you two free beers.”

The same man walked in and said, “I’d like to try,” so the bartender showed him to the horse stall again and went back to the bar to wait.

The man came back and, sure enough, said, “The horse is crying. Give me my free beers.” The bartender, surprised yet again, went back to the stall to check and found that the horse was indeed crying.

The bartender told the man, “Before I give you your beer you have to tell me how in the world you did that.”

The man said, “First, I told the horse my dick was bigger than his…

…then I showed it to him.”

Source:  reddit.com

 

 

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Dave

Author: Dave

Hi, I'm Dave. And I'm a....sex fiend?!? No, not really. But, Kinda :) Actually, I'm just your average white collar guy who happens to have a soft spot for sexy WOMEN and HOT sex toys. Hence, these are my chosen topics for this blog. I'm fluent in 3 languages: English, Profanity and Sarcasm. I own a number of male sex toys, and my personal "toybox" is growing rapidly. But prostate toys are my favorite. So, enjoy the ride, and drop me a line if you have something to say!

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