For the ULTIMATE male orgasm, try prostate milking!

“Don’t worry,” she said. “Just sit back, relax and enjoy the ride, Dave”

Those were the words of an old flame right before she blew my mind with a prostate milking session. It was my first. She popped my cherry, so to speak. I knew right then and there that my sex life would never be the same.

Today you’re going to learn everything I know about prostate play. The whole kit and caboodle. After a few hundred orgasms, I’m sharing my findings with the world.

Now you can be a sex superstar too.


WARNING. Extreme pleasure awaits.


Table of contents

  1. What is prostate milking?
  2. How does it feel?
  3. How do I find my prostate?
  4. What is internal massage?
  5. External massage?
  6. Will I get an erection?
  7. Will it give me an orgasm?
  8. Will I really be able to have multiple orgasms?
  9. Should it make me cum?
  10. How do I play safe?
  11. Is anal douching necessary?
  12. Does it mean I’m less of a man?
  13. Prostate play videos
  14. How I got started




1. What is prostate massage/milking?



Throughout this post, I’ll be using the terms massage and milking interchangeably. To me, they are one and the same.

Also, you’ll notice I use the term P-Spot frequently. That’s short for prostate.


Why do it?

Because it feels amazing, and you can do it solo if you wish.

The idea here is to rub and apply mild pressure to the area around the prostate.

This is awesome for a couple of reasons:

Emotionally it allows me to feel primal, erotic sexual sensations that cannot be experienced via traditional sex or masturbation. I also like the feeling of doing something taboo, naughty or frowned upon. It gets me off. It feels exciting to me!

Physiologically it feels so good because my prostate, and anal cavity in general, is a VERY sensitive area, full of nerve endings. Even light, manual stimulation can be enough to make me blow a load. Seriously. Like with the emotional aspect, the act of physically placing something in my ass to get me off is pretty damn exciting, in addition to the excellent physical sensations!


Too old or too young?

Nope and nope. You are NEVER too old or young to enjoy this erotic pleasure. What you do with your body and pleasure is your business. If it feels good…just do it! Who cares whether you’re 18 or 85?


It’s best with a partner!

There’s no better way to enjoy prostate milking than with your lover or friend. A trusted partner can apply more consistent pressure and hit those “difficult to reach” areas much better than you can when flying solo.

Know that communication is critical for this, as you will need to let your partner know what feels good and what doesn’t.

Think of it as psychological submission. Having another person (girlfriend or boyfriend) massage your p-spot is a mind blowing experience. By laying back and letting them do their thing, you’re essentially submitting to this person and allowing them to dominate you. Excellent for the Sub or the Dom that just needs a change of pace.

Briefly passing sexual control of my body over to another person was a difficult, yet necessary part of my journey to orgasmic liberation. It completely changes the experience, for the better. I encourage you to try the same!



2. How it feels

You might be asking yourself: “So what’s awesome about prostate milking, Dave? How does it feel?”

Well, I received an email from a reader recently who answers this question better than I could have. This is what Karl from Denmark had to say. If this doesn’t get you fired up to try prostate massage, I don’t know what will.


Dear Dave:

I am a man, 67 years old, single (divorced), and I just want to thank you for your site/post since it just made it for me. I have never been into anal sex, but about two months ago I stumbled into it googling for remedies for an enlarged prostate. What I found was that prostate massage might be the answer to my benignly enlarged prostate.

Today I stumbled into your site and read that with prostate sexuality you have to have patience, awareness, really good time etc. (your post: It takes time . . . )

So I followed your instructions and it became quite nice, – I could hit all the right spots etc. Nice, but no orgasm. After a good deal of time I just couldn’t stand it any longer so I left it there and cleaned up. Afterwards I sat down in a chair to read.

And then it hit me!

For at least half an hour I was in heaven. Just sitting in that chair, my pelvis rotating like hell, I experienced one orgasm after another. Orgasms that seem to include my whole body, (except my penis!). The orgasms were centered in my prostate area but hit right up into my breast, my heart I would say, where I had a “feeling-orgasm”.

The last one hit right up through my throat and towards my brain, I didn’t now that was even possible. I have never experienced anything like it, it just went on and on, and a part of me just wouldn’t believe it – here I was just sitting in a chair without any form of outer stimuli, orgasming over and over again.

After the last orgasm, reaching up towards my head, I started coming down, but I was left utterly and completely chattered for hours. WAUW!!!

So again, thank you for your very instructive and not-comdemning site. As I said, it really made it for me. THANK YOU!




3. How do I find my prostate?

You need a destination before beginning a journey…

Here’s a step by step guide to help you locate it:

  1. Have a bowel movement.  This will ensure your rectum is cleaned out and ready to go.
  2. Wash up, or take a shower.  Anal play is best when everything is clean down there.
  3. Trim those nails!  File down any sharp edges.  The last thing you want to do is cut or nick yourself.
  4. Get into position.  I recommend you simply lie on your back, with knees bent, and feet pulled back toward your butt.  Placing a pillow under your butt is helpful.
  5. Put a bit of lube (read more about those here) on your index finger and/or anus
  6. Stick that index finger in your rectum, or have a partner do it for you
  7. GENTLY slide it in to about the second knuckle.  You may have to go a little deeper.  All men are different.
  8. Curl the tip of your finger up, toward your belly button
  9. You may need to feel around a bit.  When you’re in the right spot, you’ll feel a “different’ sensation.  Not necessarily pleasureable, just different.



Locate your prostate. Find your male G spot. source:



Here’s a great instructional video

This is a demonstration on how to find it, using a plastic drink bottle. It sounds weird, but watch the video and you’ll understand.



Things to consider

You won’t be able to touch the prostate directly.  The rectal wall is like a barrier.  The pressure you apply with your finger pushes the rectal wall, which transmits pressure to the prostate gland.

Sometimes it’s good to “warm up” first.  Massaging your anus and/or perineum can get you in the mood and loosen things up before you take the plunge.  This is also referred to as external prostate massage; read about that in the next section below.

Don’t just plunge your finger into your rectum.  It’s best to start slow, especially if you’re feeling stressed, or not totally relaxed.  By placing the pad of your index finger (not the tip) onto your anus and taking some deep, meditative breaths, you can make the process a little easier on yourself.  Once you’re ready, THEN you can put it in there the rest of the way.

If you’re having a hard time reaching or finding it, another guy might be able to help you out. Who knows a prostate better than another man? Check out this reader submission from a guy who’s experienced it.



4. Internal prostate massage

There are two ways to enjoy prostate play. Internally and externally. If sticking things in your ass for pleasure doesn’t interest you, go ahead and jump to the next section and read about external massage.

BUT DON’T DO THAT.  Internal is the way to go! Why? Because it feels the best and is the best way to get off.


So you’re ready to stick something up your butt?

You have two choices here: fingers or sex toys.

Either one will work, but a specialized device called a prostate toy (my top recommendations here) will make the experience easier and more pleasant.

After sticking things in my ass for a few years now, I’ve learned a few things.

  1. Start small. A finger is a great way to get acquainted.
  2. There is no substitute for a specialized prostate toy that’s designed for the job.
  3. Use plenty of lube. Suggestions for every imaginable type can be found here.

I have a separate post that discusses internal stimulation and how to use a toy, right here. Make sure you check that one out, as the guide is very detailed and has LOTS of reader commentary at the bottom. Truly a must read post.


5. External prostate massage


If you’re not comfortable with using a prostate toy or sticking things inside your bum, another way to go is external prostate massage.  Anal penetration is not required with this method.

The P-spot is rubbed from the outside, usually by applying pressure to the perineum.

The perineum is an erogenous zone for both men and it’s located between your scrotum and anus, between your legs. See the image below.




This area is also referred to as the “taint.”  If you’re feeling around down there, it’s that area that feels like it has a raised “ridge”.  The prostate is located directly above this area.

Before we get started, I’ll offer one caveat: this method isn’t NEARLY as effective as the internal method (sticking things in your butt). There is a greater distance between the sweet spot and the outside of the body. This makes it harder to hit.

Yes, it still feels good. But the sensations are much less intense. In fact, in my opinion, it’s difficult to reach orgasm this way. Your chances of having a mind bending, body shaking orgasm are much less.


Here’s how to do it

If you’re doing it by yourself (solo), the easiest way is to use your fingers.  Here is the method I use, and recommend to others. The first two steps are identical to preparing for an internal session:

– It’s easiest to do this while laying on your back, in a comfortable location.  I find that my bed is the best place.

– Get yourself relaxed.  Meditate, listen to erotica, listen to soothing music, read erotic stories, etc.  Whatever it takes to get you into a calm, clear state of mind.  I also like to perform breathing exercises, as this helps tremendously.

– Use only 3 fingers:  ring, middle and index.  Hold them closely together, so they are touching each other.

– While laying on your back, with your knees up and feet on the bed, place your fingers on your perineum and apply some firm, but gentle pressure.  Do this until you find the right spot.  If you haven’t done this before, it may take a bit to locate the proper area

– Once you’re in the “zone”, I find it works best to perform it in sets or reps.  Similar to repetitions that a weightlifter would do for their workout.  For me, a set would be massaging the spot slowly but firmly 6 times in a counter clockwise motion.  Follow this with a set of the same number of repetitions, except move clockwise.

Perform these repetitions many times, for as long as you feel comfortable.

You will want to experiment with various pressures or motions.  What works good for me may not work well for you



How to make it even better!

I’ve found that using this technique DURING masturbation will significantly enhance my orgasm!

Here’s how I do it:  when I’m close to reaching climax (within 30 seconds of ejaculation) I start with the massage technique described above.  I continue until I finish.

It will take some practice to get the timing right, but once you do, you’ll find that the intensity of your orgasms will increase significantly.  They’ll also have a longer duration.

Sometimes the climax is so intense that it leaves me physically drained for several minutes afterwards.


6. Will I get an erection?

Probably. I get one almost every single time. But remember, nothing is abnormal here. You may get a monster erection. You may stay limp as a freshly boiled noodle.

Prostate pleasure has nothing to do with having an erect penis.

The resulting pleasure is pretty much the same whether I’m hard or soft. This is the beauty of this activity.


BONUS: Are you a guy who suffers from erectile dysfunction or have had prostate cancer?

If you have ED or have dealt with cancer down there, you’re in luck. An erect penis is not required to thoroughly enjoy this activity! You can experience the same pleasure as a virile 20 something dude!





7. Will I have a prostate orgasm?

If you play your cards right, YES!

Prostate orgasm is the grand finale for any guy that practices prostate play. This is the pinnacle of the experience. The icing on the cake!  When combined with other forms of masturbation (like jacking off), there will be loads of “icing” shooting from his cock, if done properly! Get out the towels and the wet wipes, because things could get messy…in a good way.


Prostate vs. Traditional orgasm

This is based on my own personal experiences.  Your results may differ.

For me, these orgasms are somewhat similar to the ones I get from jacking off or vaginal sex.  They’re just MUCH more intense and last for A LOT longer.  Shooting a big load all over your partner’s back is an incredible sensation, right?  Who the heck doesn’t like that!?!?

Now, imagine that feeling, multiplied by a factor of two or three.  The sensations aren’t just focused around the genitals and immediate vicinity, either.  They can be felt from deep inside your ass all the way up to your abdominal area.

As if that isn’t enough, these orgasms often come in multiples.  If you keep stimulating, they’ll keep coming. Kind of like the Energizer bunny…you can keep going, and going, and going, and going..


Here’s the best analogy I can think of to describe this vs. standard orgasm:

If you’re getting old, like me, you probably remember AM radio. That ancient, crackly mono technology, most youngsters will never get to experience. But it was still cool for us, because we didnt know any better. This is like the standard orgasm.

Now, fast forward to the 21st century. We have THX quality audio systems in hour homes. Everyone seems to have an iPod or smart phone that pumps crystal clear HI-FI audio straight into straight their ears. Let’s call this the big prostate “O”.

And that’s the difference.  It’s like night and day. Or Yin and Yang. You really need to experience it for yourself to fully understand it.

You’re almost there when…

Here are some of the sensations you might experience.  Remember, it’s different for every guy.  These are things I’ve felt from my own play time:

  • I’ll feel contractions outside the area of stimulation.  The thigh and pelvic areas will start to contract the muscles all on their own.
  • I get a warm sensation in my pelvic area, and around the genitals
  • I have a sense of “fullness” in my pelvic and abdominal areas
  • I’ll feel a  fullness in my urethra, even though i’m not playing anywhere near that area
  • I’ll sometimes feel like I can’t hold your bladder.  Personally, I’ve never pissed myself while doing this, it just feels like it.  Regardless, this is why it’s wise to keep a towel nearby.


What it isn’t

As I mentioned earlier, these orgasms have NOTHING to do with the genitals.  It’s an entirely different sexual response, and quite frankly, it’s much more intense than traditional masturbation.


A note on shemale orgasm

If you’re into shemale porn, you’ve probably noticed that this is a pretty big deal in that realm as well.  With that said, it works the same way.  As long as “her” prostate is still intact, all the same rules apply.


8. Wait, did you say multiple orgasms?

YES!!  Multiple orgasms are possible for us guys too!

Here’s why:  orgasm achieved via prostate massage does not result in ejaculation in the traditional sense.  Once you ejaculate, you’re done, at least for the time being.  This is a result of the refractory period, during which it’s impossible to have more orgasms.  All men will experience this refractory period.  The time can vary from minutes to hours.

Without ejaculation, orgasms can keep coming fast and strong, sometimes within seconds of each other.  My personal best is 5 orgasms, back to back, about 20 seconds apart.  Now, this didn’t happen overnight.  It was the result of months of practice and playing around with different techniques.  My point is, if I can do it, so can you.  Just be patient.


9. Should it make me cum?

By itself, prostate play doesnt make me cum. When combined with other penile stimulation activities it makes me shoot ropes of cum.

It does, however, make me drip pre-cum profusely! Like tons of it. If you’re lucky and have a partner that loves your cum, this is a great opportunity for them to lap up some of your sweet man juice. It’s a bit embarrassing for me sometimes because the amount is so much, it’ll show right through a pair of jeans. Yikes!

For other guys, they don’t drip a drop. I have no idea why some guys leak and some don’t. But it really doesn’t matter either way. Every guy is different, so it’s expected that his sexual responses are different as well.

Lots of Mr. Racy readers have emailed me over the years, asking these questions: “Is it normal if I don’t have any pre cum?” or “Is it normal if I have TONS of pre cum?”

I believe that it makes no difference at all! As long as it feels good, keep on milking. There is no normal or abnormal here. It’s all about his pleasure. Nothing else.


BONUS TIP #1: If you wanna cum REALLY, REALLY hard, follow up with a vigorous cock stroking after getting milked. It’ll be one of the best orgasms you’ve ever had.

BONUS TIP #2: While you’re masturbating and getting close to climax, have your partner rub your prostate until you ejaculate. Keep jacking until you blow your load. You might just enter the mystical realm of total Nirvana. A higher level of orgasmic goodness.





10. Play safe and clean


I think we can ALL agree that pleasuring the male prostate and the resulting orgasm are the ultimate sexual experiences a man can have.  But care must be taken so we don’t hurt ourselves.  Prostate stimulation isn’t dangerous.  However, by playing safe (lots of lube and a gentle touch) you can virtually eliminate any chance of injury down there.


Follow these 3 rules to stay safe

  1. Only stick things up your ass that were designed for that purpose.  This means using something like an Aneros device.  NOT a broom handle or electric toothbrush!
  2. Follow the manufacturer instructions that came with your device.  They will tell you how to lube, clean and maintain it.  Don’t forget:  READ THE INSTRUCTIONS.
  3. Moderation is key.  I strongly recommend against doing this every day.  Start slow.  Give your body at least 48 hours rest between sessions.  Then, after you’ve had a lot of practice, you will know better what your body can handle.


Anal fissures

You can get what’s called an anal fissure when you don’t use enough lube, or by playing too rough.  This is exactly what it sounds like: a tear or cut in the rectal wall.  It can be caused by using an anal toy or by anal intercourse.  Yeah, painful.



Fortunately, they normally heal quickly, and you’re back in business in no time.


Reduce the risk:  self stimulate

If you’re inexperienced, you can play it extra safe by first playing on your own.  Learn first about your preferences and how your body will respond.  Once you’re comfortable with it, then bring a partner into the mix.  The added benefit of solo play is that you can do it with privacy, in your own home.


If you feel pain…

Stop what you’re doing…immediately!  Pain means something’s wrong.  See a doctor if you have any of the following symptoms.

rectal pain symtoms





11. Do I need to wash my butt hole?

Anal douching is a great way to clean things up down there and get things ready for action. There’s something unsettling when you pull your favorite anal toy out of your ass, and notice that bit of creamy poo stuck on it. Eeewwww, right?

Well, for me it’s not a huge deal. It’s part of the territory and I’ve come to accept it. I personally don’t do it on a regular basis, because I’ve found I don’t really need to. I’m kind of a clean freak.

Next, I have an email from one of my readers. He had a couple things to say about ass douching:

I just discovered your site via the article on Alternet. Kudos to you for embarking on this worthy endeavor. I particularly like your casual fun manner of speaking. You are going to be enhancing people’s lives beyond belief.

I’m a long time ass aficionado. I’ve never come across any sort of published information regarding ass play so straight forwardly and clearly explained. Well done! (I haven’t actually done a lot of research, but I really do like your style.)

Although I’ve only just perused the site, I’d like to mention one issue I have yet to see covered; that is the issue of douching as a part of the cleansing preparation. Internal cleanliness, at the very least, the rectum, is a great enhancement to a fully enjoyable experience.

I realize this is the big “ick” factor as regards preparation, but the sooner it’s “de-icked” the better. And it’s better to deal with the “ick” before one begins the activity, rather than during or after. (It can be a real buzz-kill on the afterglow…)

This is an issue I feel is not discussed nearly enough. It’s the big unspoken ICK, but, like so many other icky things, it gets easier with practice.

Regardless, I again congratulate you on your most excellent undertaking and look forward to seeing how it develops.

Good luck,

Sage advice, friend! Thanks for your input!


What the heck is douching?

It’s a simple matter of utilizing water pressure to cleanse your rectum. Women sometimes use it in their vaginas. Both men and women can do it to clean out the anal cavity.

This is a very useful practice to ensure cleanliness before anal activities. This includes prostate play!


How do I do it?

Easy. The first thing you need to do is grab the right device for the job. Sometimes called enema bulbs or rectal syringes, they’re readily available from your favorite online retailer or local drug store. And they’re cheap. You can generally find a decent one for less than $10 US.

If you’re searching online, just type in rectal bulb syringe. There are a million options to choose from.


rectal bulb syringe

From: wikimedia commons


To use it, follow these steps:

  1. Get your enema bottle ready to go. Fill it with lukewarm water.
  2. Stand over the toilet or in the tub.
  3. Lube the tip and insert into your anus.
  4. Squeeze the bulb, then release. This shoots the water into your asshole, washing out all those nasties. Keep doing it until the water comes out clean and clear. You’ll probably need to refill it a couple of times.


Or you can watch the video below.


A clean asshole is definitely beneficial when playing around down there. And anal douching is about the best way to make that happen. Cleanliness is next to godliness.



12. Does it mean I’m less of a man?

This is a topic that bothered me when I first embarked on this sexual journey.

I received an email recently that started like this:

“I don’t know why, but i feel guilty about playing with my prostate. Have you ever felt like this before?”

Sound familiar? I felt EXACTLY like that once.


no shame


Prostate play doesn’t make you gay

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again.  Sticking things up your ass for pleasure has no reflection on you as a person.  If it feels good, then do it!  NEVER be ashamed of sexual pleasures that make you feel good.

There are some guys that have experienced prostate massage with another man. If it’s something you might feel comfortable with, check out this reader submission, right here.


13. Prostate Play videos!




From the Conan Show on TBS

Let’s start with a video from Conan on TBS.  I’ve always loved his comedic style, and this episode is no exception.  But…an interview with the always delicious Sex Expert, Dr. Jennifer Berman, is definitely out of the norm.  She discusses, from a woman’s point of view, how to stimulate a guy’s prostate.  Very interesting.  Check it out!





If you’ve watched the American Pie movie series, you’ll recognize this guy: it’s Stifler. No more needs to be said. Just watch the clip.



Calm, soothing stimulation with William

For a more chill video, here’s one from a guy named William. Apparently he’s very good at massaging himself, based on his relaxed delivery. I need to learn more from this guy.

You can visit his site right here and learn even more about prostate milking. Informative and easy to understand. Definitely worth a look.




Ken & Sunny

Here’s one by a couple named Ken and Sunny. It’s pretty cool seeing two people who are so in touch with each others sexuality. If you don’t recognize Sunny, she has her own SHOWTIME called Sex with Sunny Megatron.



A technical video

For an academic perspective on the gland, here’s a very informative video with great animation. Your prostate IQ will actually rise after watching  🙂




14. How I got started

Years ago, I was introduced to this activity by a lady friend. Let’s just say she was A LOT more adventurous than I. We had been dating for only a few months, but were having LOTS of really hot, passionate sex. She was the daring type: I liked that. One night in bed she just brought it up, out of the blue. She was never afraid to speak her mind. That’s what turned me on about her.

She wanted to do something very special for me, as a gift: a prostate massage. I thought about it for a bit, and said “Certainly!” I’ve also chronicled my first experience. Click here to read “The Passion of the Prostate: an Erotic Love Story”.

Of course I had dabbled with anal play, just never my PROSTATE! Little did I know that this first experience would change my life. Once I learned just how satisfying it was, I never looked back.




So what are you waiting for? Get busy and start practicing! It’s never too late to start.

Just remember. Patience is a virtue. You probably won’t get the hang of this the first time. You probably won’t by the tenth time, either. Just be persistent and good things will happen in due time.


Some related content you might enjoy:



Author: Dave

Hi, I'm Dave. And I'm fiend?!? No, not really. But, Kinda :) Actually, I'm just your average white collar guy who happens to have a soft spot for sexy WOMEN and HOT sex toys. Hence, these are my chosen topics for this blog. I'm fluent in 3 languages: English, Profanity and Sarcasm. I own a number of male sex toys, and my personal "toybox" is growing rapidly. But prostate toys are my favorite. So, enjoy the ride, and drop me a line if you have something to say!

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  1. I’m a regular when it comes to anal play, but this was different. The orgasm was unexpected and uncontrollable. My body vibrated violently. If this is what women experience regularly, then WOW. I learned a lot about my prostate and how to stimulate it.

    But what was more important was that I had to relax my mind. I found that if I was too anxious about it, I was unable to receive the pleasure. The other thing is PATIENCE. This is not a 1, 2, 3 thing, at least not for me. Took me about 30 minutes to reach that orgasm, but it was worth the perseverance.

    My prostate needs to have constant pressure in order to get anywhere near an orgasm, and I found that different toys varied in their effectiveness. Result: bigger is better. A certain length is needed to reach the prostate and stimulate it consistently; that length differs from guy to guy. Girth is just as important because it keeps the pressure applied to the prostate without much effort on my end. It also feels great just for stimulating and stretching my anus. I use regular dildos (but big ones) and they work just fine.

    And LUBE. You can’t have to much when you’re doing this. These are my findings. Just remember to keep and open mind and surrender to the sensations, even if they feel weird (but not painful).

    Dave, thank you for enlightening the world.

    Post a Reply
    • Dave

      Thanks for the kind words, Gray!

      I agree with your sentiments EXACTLY. Happy massaging!

      Post a Reply
  2. Great post Dave for beginners and experienced milkers alike.I just love milking myself this way! Once you’ve tried it you never go back believe me!

    Post a Reply
  3. Hi.. Had my first experience with ‘milking’ this past weekend. I’ve tried often over the past few years with fingers and toys, only to see very little clear pre-cum and no other results. (I’m not a leaker, so I rarely see pre-cum — would love to know how to increase pre-cum regularly.)
    But, recently my wife and I started using a strap-on where I am ‘receiving’ a very nice sized dildo. Formerly, I was using a bulb-style cleaner in preparation, but recently upgraded to a shower enema cleaning system with multiple attachment options. I spent about 45 minutes in the shower this past Sunday evening trying out the different attachments. One attachment is particularly longer and I really enjoyed its effectiveness, when all the sudden, I felt a discharge sensation from my penis. It was milky, mostly medium consistency like cum but contained a good amount of thinner fluid too. Did I just cum? It didn’t have the same orgasmic sensation as a penile-stimulated orgasm. I wasn’t even erect. At any rate, I’m looking forward to my next 45-minute shower!!!

    Post a Reply
    • Hey, you mention that this discharge happened, and that it’s something you want to repeat, but you didn’t actually mention whether it was pleasurable or not. 🙂

      Post a Reply
      • Dave

        For me personally, the discharge isn’t anything special. It’s just a “side effect” that has no overall bearing on the physical experience.

        Hopefully Ray will come back and relay his experience 🙂

        Post a Reply
  4. Hello Dave,

    I have been having prostate play Noe for about two months and like the guy who commented above I feel extremely aroused and hard after an hour in but just as I feel relaxed and near my body seems to get slightly tense and I lose the feeling. I am using the lelo hugo which is good but could I benefit from something different? I am determined to get there and won’t give up just wish it would come sooner.



    Post a Reply
  5. After I have gone through all the steps and have my toy inserted, how often do I contract my muscles to stimulate my prostate? I guess I am a little anal (no pun intended) but things work better for me if I know what to do. Do I do contractions constantly, hold and count, multiple times in a row….just wondering. Thanks Dave. I really like your site.

    Post a Reply
    • Dave

      Hello Glenn:

      This experience is a bit different for every guy, but if I were you, I would experiment with different patterns. For example, try constant contractions with the hold and count. Beware that your muscles will get tired if they aren’t used to this.

      If that doesn’t work, change it up a bit with hold and contract. Then release and wait 20 seconds and repeat. Just experiment until you find what works for you.

      Post a Reply
  6. I had a guy massage my prostate for the first time last week. He was so gentle and took his time. I thought I was going to loose it; it was incredible. I never had a guy fuck my ass with his finger but it was great. I came so fast and kept cuming for about a minute. I had cum all over the place.

    Post a Reply
  7. Dave, thanks for diving into and sharing what you know on this topic. I just read your “Art of milking” and although you share about the results, I was hoping for more details on techniques once the prostrate is located.

    Post a Reply
    • Dave

      Hey man, glad you stopped by. How timely, I’m in the process of updating this post that includes those details! Stay tuned…I should have something up soon.

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  8. The first time I was introduced to anything having to do with the prostate was when I was about 36 years old. I was having an odd sensation in my prostate. Following and exam a urologist said he needed to collect some fluid or precumm from my prostate and have it tested. He did what is called milking the prostate. So as I stood he sat in a chair massaging my prostate with one finger while he held my penis in the other hand waiting for the fluid to come out. This went on for a while then it was over. As it turned out there was not anything wrong with my prostate. But after that I bought an Aneros Helix to milk my own prostate. I never had any type of orgasm with it. I did sometimes have a very pleasant or relaxing feeling stay in my prostate and sometimes in my balls for awhile after I finished with the Helix. So now to my question. I was wondering if I got something bigger like the Tantus P-Spot or perhaps better yet something like the Mangasm Voyage Large Prostate Simulator, if I would have a better chance at having the prostate orgasm. I read the reviews for the Voyage and the guys on their reviews make it sound too good not to try. So what are your thoughts? I don’t want to buy something and spend time only to find out that it was all for nothing. Alan.

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    • Dave

      Hello Alan,

      I have never used the Mangasm Voyager. Although it looks like a pretty decent toy for a fairly low cost. It’s hard to say if something bigger would work for you, since I don’t know your situation. For me personally, bigger does indeed work better. Especially with the P-Spot, it’s not only big, but long. I can really get it up in there when I need to go deep. P-spot is also very inexpensive. I’d give that a go, or go for the Voyager and get vibration with it. Happy massaging!

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  9. I’ve been reading through a lot of this stuff, and i guess I’m just glad to know it might take a little while and numerous attempts to get right. I’ve been using plugs and dildos for years now, but never knew about prostate massage, and so i picked up something simple to try it with. Needless to say the toy i picked up (California exotics p-rock prostate massager) didn’t really get me where i wanted. Definitely noted that i need to avoid cheaper products. The biggest problem with the toy i got was that it just wouldn’t stay put and it was hard to stay focused and relaxed when having to wrestle with it. Hoping i can find my o in the future, and plan on getting something from your reviewed and proven list of toys instead.

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  10. That moment when you realize you’ve been rubbing your bladder…

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  11. Hey Dave,
    I’m a relatively new reader to your blog since I started experimenting with my new desire to try to discover the big O. But like many guys I have been met with the relenting dissapointment that often comes with it. I’m sure guys like me can relate to having a very elusive p spot that is almost impossible to pinpoint and for me I have only ever caught faint shimmers of it through touch. Even after I bought a p spot vibrator I was still having difficulty pinpointing it. I continued to read through your blogs and admit it was partially a relaxation problem. But even taking my time and giving myself plenty of it I still feel I’m not getting anywhere. I’m not giving up but some advice would be much appreciated. I’m sure I’m not the only guy having this problem too where no matter what they try nothing seems to work in terms of finding their p spot.

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    • Dave

      Hey Luke,

      Thanks for stopping by! My first thought is this: is your toy long enough? Or perhaps you need something with a bit more girth. My advice may vary, depending on the toy(s) you are using.

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  12. Question: you mentioned prostate massage with your girlfriend, does she use a toy on you, and if so, which do you suggest?

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    • Dave

      Hello Mike:

      I have two toys that are great for couples: Billy and Hugo

      The Lelo Billy is great because she can use it like a dildo. I kinda enjoy the in and out action with vibrations, so this is a great toy to enjoy the best of both worlds.

      The Lelo Hugo is awesome for a totally different reason. It has a wireless remote control. We like to switch “roles” in the bedroom from time to time. When she’s playing DOM, she gets to control the vibrations from afar. She can tease and dominate me in any way she likes, as the control is in her hands. Remember, Hugo isn’t designed for in and out action…it just stays in place.

      So, depending on what you’re looking for, these are both outstanding toys for couples play. I’m lucky to have both of them in our toybox!

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  13. I’m nervous but would like to try!!! Any first timer advice?

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    • Dave

      Hey Joe!

      Thanks for stopping by. The best advice for first timers is right here: my prostate toy user manual.

      Just follow along and you’ll be well on your way!


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      • I just did it and my ass feels relaxed and my body feels like it’s melting into my bed best orgasm ever

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    • I found, when I first started using any toys at all, that I wasn’t using enough lube…I mean, when I first started using my finger a lot and then my wifes dildo, it just seemed to burn…and when I found my prostate I told myself that I had to find a way to make this work. I started using more lube, I even pull the toy out after it has been fully inserted and lube it again before putting it in the final time. I started by putting a dildo between the mates and box springs of my bed, so that it was like someone behind me and I would get on hands and knees and slowly, slowly work my asshole onto it. Then I would start to fuck my ass into the dildo. Don’t be afraid to visualize and fantasize while you do this because it increases the relaxation and heightens the taboo, I am totally straight, but the first time I fantasized about backing myself up onto a real guys tool I had an amazing orgasm that made me shake. I eventually got a proper, curved vibrating dildo with a suction cup and I can get my ass fucked in any position, and save the vibration for when I’m getting close and then put it in full vibe. I know that I need in and out insertion for my prostate to feel it, and I slowly ride my dildo while kneeling over it and stroking my cock at the same time. It’s often somewhat uncomfortable for awhile, but about 15 minutes later, after I start letting my ass fully relax and the riding gets smoother and steadier I go from being semi-hard to really hard as the orgasm approaches and then it’s all this fluid flying everywhere! Feels different than a normal jack off, but is just as good or better, and I also am able to recover quicker and start again in 5 minutes…I can’t do this with just a normal jerk session.

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  14. Just a question. Will you compare the Aneros Vice and the Lelo Hugo? Which is your favorite?

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    • Dave

      Hello and thanks for stopping by!

      Here are my thoughts:

      Vice – Definitely a nice product. Very durable and feels very nice. As far as thickness and “feeling full”, it’s about on par with the Hugo. No remote control, you’ll have to reach down and hit the button to change settings. Also, I don’t feel that the vibrations are as intense or enjoyable. Can be purchased for under $100 US.

      Hugo – My favorite vibrator, until something better comes along! LOTS of different vibration patterns and intensities. The wireless remote is pretty awesome. Unfortunately, it runs over $200 US. This is a pretty hefty sum to pay for a vibrator, but well worth it in my opinion.

      Common to both – They’re both waterproof. Both hands free, once inserted. The only thing you’ll need hands for is to change the settings. They are both constructed of excellent, high grade silicone. They both come from very reputable manufacturers. However, Lelo’s 10 year product guarantee is pretty nice. This means if the toy craps out during years 2-10, they will give you a 50% discount on your next toy.

      I feel that they are both great toys, but Hugo is quite expensive. It all comes down to your personal budget.

      Hope this helps!


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  15. Hi Dave,

    I came across your blog and I’m glad I did. I have been exploring this area for about 2 years. My first prostate orgasm was in October 2014. I didn’t really know what to expect that time. I was using the Aneros HelixSyn and lots of lube. It took me two hours to finally reach that sensational deep orgasm. I didn’t expect the prostate fluid because I wasn’t even erect. It is truly a completely separate feeling compared to a penile stimulated orgasm. The feel comes from deep inside and it is fantastic.

    But, as you mentioned in your blog, I was trying for the next super orgasm and I couldn’t get to that climax again. I tried in vain for months and got really close. The heart was racing and I would be shaking. But, after a while the feeling dissipated and I would stop.

    It is true you have to be in the right mind frame and sexual arousal. I’ve also played around with semen retention so I had a build up for months. This past week I felt my prostate was really tingling and it was begging to be massaged so I got on the bed, lubed up and stuck the aneros in there. I was using a bit of my finger to swirl the head on the prostate. But, just slightly. after awhile I felt the shakes and my heart started pounding uncontrollably. It started to feel so good. But, I started to tense up was, rushing to get there, and the feeling subsided. So I took deep belly breathes to relax and when I did, my prostate was alive again with tingles. With every breath and movement brought me closer and closer. Finally I reached the climax and it was so intense. More intense then the one in October. The aneros was going crazy with the contractions. It was truly amazing. It’s hard to believe that we men have the capability to reach such a climax. You feel that your prostate has come alive after a long sleep. It was ever tingling afterward and your mind tends to go back to relive that experience.

    If most men don’t experience this type of orgasm for whatever reason, they are truly missing out. But, it is good to know that we are a small group of men that have experienced this kind of feeling, it makes me feel like I am part of an elite group.

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    • Dave

      I love to receive feedback like this! Thanks for stopping by AND for taking the time to write me! Prostate play is truly the ultimate male treat.

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