If you’re not comfortable with using a prostate toy, like the LELO Hugo, another way to manually excite the gland is by practicing external prostate massage. Anal penetration is not required with this method.
The P-spot is rubbed from the outside, usually by applying pressure to the perineum.
The wonderful perineum
The perineum is an erogenous zone for both men AND women, but we’ll be discussing men. It’s located between your scrotum and anus, between your legs. See the image below.
This area is also referred to as the “taint.” If you’re feeling around down there, it’s that area that feels like it has a raised “ridge”. The prostate is located directly above this area.
In my opinion, this is most fun when you’re playing with a partner. With a little coaching, they can perform it FAR more effectively.
Before we get started, I’ll offer one caveat: this method isn’t NEARLY as effective as the internal method. There is a greater distance between the sweet spot and the outside of the body. This makes it harder to hit.
Yes, it still feels good. But the sensations are much less intense. In fact, in my opinion, it’s difficult to reach orgasm this way. Your chances of having a mind bending, body shaking orgasm are much less.
If you’re doing it solo…
If you’re doing it by yourself (solo), the easiest way is to use your fingers. Here is the method I use, and recommend to others. The first two steps are identical to preparing for an internal session:
– It’s easiest to do this while laying on your back, in a comfortable location. I find that my bed is the best place.
– Get yourself relaxed. Meditate, listen to erotica, soothing music, etc. Whatever it takes to get you into a calm, clear state of mind. I also like to perform breathing exercises, as this helps tremendously.
– Use only 3 fingers: ring, middle and index. Hold them closely together, so they are touching each other.
– While laying on your back, with your knees up and feet on the bed, place your fingers on your perineum and apply some firm, but gentle pressure. Do this until you find the right spot. If you haven’t done this before, it may take a bit to locate the proper area
– Once you’re in the “zone”, I find it works best to perform it in sets or reps. Similar to repetitions that a weightlifter would do for their workout. For me, a set would be massaging the spot slowly but firmly 6 times in a counter clockwise motion. Follow this with a set of the same number of repetitions, except move clockwise.
Perform these repetitions many times, for as long as you feel comfortable.
You will want to experiment with various pressures or motions. What works good for me may not work well for you
So how does it feel?
Wonderful, actually. Just not as good as the more stimulating, internal method.
But it still feels pretty damn sensual. A guy can still experience that special tingle when the prostate is rubbed just the right way. That sensation that makes his entire midsection buzz with pleasure.
Here’s the best thing I can compare it to: as a guy, my dick is important to me. Sometimes when I’m sitting on the couch and nobody else is home, I like to shove my hand down my pants and hold my dick in my hand. Gently cupping my balls, lightly caressing my cock. Never to erection, just because it feels good.
There’s something primal about it. Something soothing and relaxing. Well, this is similar to the experience of having my prostate massaged from the outside.
Remember: prostate massage, even from another man, does NOT make you gay!
How to make it even better!
I’ve found that using this technique DURING masturbation will significantly enhance your orgasm!
Here’s how you do it: when you’re close to reaching climax (within 30 seconds of ejaculation) start with the massage technique described above. Continue this until you finish.
It will take some practice to get the timing right, but once you do, you’ll find that the intensity of your orgasms will increase significantly. They will also have a longer duration.
In my experience, the climax is so intense that it leaves me physically drained for several minutes afterwards.
It’s best with a partner!
It goes without saying that sex is best with a partner! And there’s no better way to enjoy an external prostate massage than with your lover or friend. The technique remains the same as for solo. However, a partner can reach the areas much more effectively.
Communication is critical for this, as you will need to let your partner know what feels good and what doesn’t.
How about some prostate erotica?
Check out my sweet short story called “The Passion of the Prostate: an Erotic Love Story.” It might just make you hard!